The Pine Barrens Paranormal
by ZorasimplyZora
Summary: ""I can't sleep," the six year old answered, fidgeting with his stuffed bunny. "Haley told me about the Jersey Devil and I'm worried it might eat me," Beverly groaned. "The Jersey Devil is a myth, Leonard."" Oh, if only that were true Beverly. Chapter 2. The Devil makes a house call
1. Chapter 1

The Pine Barrens Paranormal

1986- Pine Barrens Forest

In a small clearing, five tents stood in a circle with an occupant in each. The first four slumbered on, dead to the world. The last and smallest tent stood sagging, on the edge of the circle, and was the closest to the forest. Cautiously, a boy no more than six pushed back the flaps, a stuffed bunny gripped tightly in his left hand. In his other was a flashlight, illuminating part of his face. Glasses clearly too big for him rested on the bridge of his nose, cherub curls framing his face. For his age, he was quite short, but his eyes would have glimmered with intelligence if not for the late hours. However, with darkness shrouding him, his eyes shone with fear.

"Mother," a six year old pushed back the entrance of the first tent, his mother slumbering rolled up in the sleeping bag. No response. That was probably due to the eye mask and earplugs. "Moth-err," He begged, as he not so gently rocked Beverly, shaking her awake.

Beverly simply turned over, grunting. "What do you want so desperately that you had to awaken me, Leonard Leakey Hofstadter?" Her son winced at the use of his full name.

"I can't sleep," he answered, fidgeting with his stuffed bunny. "Haley told me about the Jersey Devil and I'm worried it might eat me," Beverly groaned.

"The Jersey Devil is a myth, Leonard. Your sister was trying to scare you for cheap entertainment. Now please leave me alone," Beverly shoved the eye mask over her eyes once more.

"But-"

"No Buts! I don't know, just go for a walk and tire you out. Just leave me **alone**," and with that, Leonard left the tent stunned.

True it was the middle of night, but how could a mother be so cold? Leonard sniffled, and then started to make his way back to the tent when he stopped. He thought he saw something move in the forest. Naturally, his scientific curiosity got the better of him, and he plunged into the forest.

Frankly, despite the darkness, the forest did not seem that scary. The Snow White movie Haley had forced him to watch was much scarier. Slowly, he made his way through the forest, occasionally marking trees with a penknife. He had also managed to grab his compass, so he knew he was only going south of his camp.

Suddenly, he heard hooves darting in his direction. Leonard froze in terror. A deer ran past him, it's antler's barely missing Leonard's head. "_Tas!"_ a human voice shouted in an incomprehensible language. A glimmering rope shot out from the darkness in the direction the stag came from, and wrapped itself around the animal.

From the darkness, a shadowy figure stepped out, partially illuminated by Leonard's flashlight. If you looked at it head on, you would guess the person was just an eighteen-year-old girl. She had ratty vintage jeans, well wore from use and soft leather boots. A too-big leather aviator jacket protected her from the cold. Underneath Leonard could see a lithe figure, like one of a soccer player. Her face was the most impressive feature. She had a short haircut reminiscence of the 1920s, curls framing her face. Her skin was pale, contrasting with the raven-black hair. What stood out was her lightning blue eyes seemed to glow in the night, and when she turned her head and zeroed in on Leonard, he realized they were actually glowing. Leonard gulped, as he took in her other features.

From her hair, two small black horns jutted out from her head. A set of onyx bat wings folded behind her back, and her tail swished, a slight point at the end of it. "The- the Jersey Devil," Leonard stepped back in fear, clutching his stuffed bunny. "Please don't eat me!"

Her eyes softened slightly. "Kid, what are you doing in my forest so late?" she reached her hand out to him, as she bent down to look him in the eye. Despite the Pine Barrens being located in South Jersey, she spoke with the accent most New Yorkers and North Jersey locals used.

"Haley-told-me-a-story-about-you-that-scared-me-and-I-couldn't-sleep-and-mommy-wouldn't-help-me," he explained in one breath. The Jersey devil sighed as if she was used to it.

"I don't eat humans, kid. I eat deer meat and regular food," she said, pointing to the tied-up animal. "Well yeah, I have cursed people into animals, but they were always people trying to hurt me. Especially those damned Puritans," The Jersey devil muttered a few words in what appeared to be Dutch. "If I were not an immortal shadow spirit I would be a pile of ashes right now. A much crueler fate than living the rest of your life as an animal, I'd say. The spell I used would turn you into animal that represented traits you have. Some also exhibited traits that the mortal should have had as a human."

"So, you're not going to hurt me?" The Jersey devil shook her head.

"If you were an adult, I would probably just wipe your memory so you forget this incident since you are not here to kill me. But since you are just a kid, I will let you go," The Jersey devil smiled at him briefly, and Leonard noted her pearly white fangs. "But promise me this: You will swear not tell anyone I exist, nor will you come to my forest again. Okay kiddo?" She held out her hand, and he noticed despite the nails being a bit long, it was perfectly normal.

"Deal," Leonard smiled back, and wrapped his pinky around hers. She looked at him in confusion. "It's a pinky promise," he clarified. "That means I won't break it. By the way, what's your name? My name is Leonard Hofstadter,"

"Katrien Leewens," she answered. Leonard furrowed his thick brows.

"I thought your last name was Leeds?" he asked. Katrien rolled her eyes.

"That's the anglicized version. However, my father was Dutch, and that's the real version of my name," she explained. As the wind blew over them, she saw the six-year-old shiver from the cold. "Perhaps it's best that I take you back to your camp now before your parents get worried. Do you want to fly?" The boy suddenly looked awestruck. She grinned widely, showing off the fangs once again. Her tail swished behind her.

"Of course!" Katrien carefully picked the boy up, hold him close to her chest. Her wings snapped open, revealing their fifteen-foot span. She ran forward, her wings flapping as she took a leap into the air. Within seconds, they were flying above the trees.

"Is that your camp?" she asked, once they were in the air. It all seemed so quick to Leonard, but he simply nodded. Katrien leaned downward, her wings folding into a dive. Once they were close to the ground they snapped open once again like a parachute, and she ran until her feet touched the ground. Since it was still night, no one was awake yet.

Katrien set the boy on the ground, her wings folding behind her back once more. "You sure I can't visit you?" Leonard asked. Smiling sadly, she ruffled the boy's hair.

"Sorry Leonard, but it is for our own good, now please head back to your family," Leonard looked into her glowing blue eyes once more and realized she is serious. He turned around heading back to his family.

When he looks back, he saw her lean against a tree, and melt into the shadows.

28 years later, early fall, 2015

Morristown, New Jersey

Next month, Leonard and Penny plan to get married. It still surprised him how he managed to get married to his blonde beauty, but he had. Meanwhile his own appearance had not changed much, only his glasses changing from the ones too big for his head to a rectangular black plastic rim like a hipster. But first, Penny insisted on visiting their respective families.

Leonard knew his friends thought his entire family inspired him to move out of New Jersey, but it was only his mother. Despite the occasional horror movie, Haley was never a bad sister, and Michael occasionally stood up for Leonard. His father traveled a lot so Leonard didn't have a reason to hate him, since his father always brought something in return and Uncle Floyd filled in the gaps.

Most of the time spent in New Jersey was at his brother's house, since his nephew was adorable. Like his uncle, he had curly hair, but the dusty brown of his mother, Leonard's sister in law. His nephew had an interest in physics as well, so Leonard spent the week he was visiting explaining some of the Physics theories and doing experiments with his nephew.

"So, Penny, has my big brother shown you any of the tourist spots here in the great state of New Jersey yet?" Michael asked at dinner. The big brother thing was a bit of a joke, due to Michael's eight inches over Leonard. The family of three, the young couple, and a single aunt sat around a cherry dining table, eating salmon Michael's wife Sarah had cooked.

"So far, only the Stone Pony," Penny, answered after taking a bite of the salmon.

"How about you visit the Liberty Science center? You can take me!" Jason suggested eagerly, bouncing in his seat. Michael laughed, ruffling his son's hair.

"Maybe not. Leonard's lab is much cooler," Penny, answered. Leonard looked up sheepishly. "That was what you planned on taking me to," she deadpanned, looking at her fiancé.

"Hey I was also going to take you to Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty!" he defended.

"I would suggest going to a Yankee game or to a Devils game but it's impossible to get tickets. Plus, I know Leonard isn't a fan of sports," Michael muttered. "Shame too, I love seeing them play."

"How about you go visit Pine Barrens? You know, where the Jersey Devil is," Haley suggested, a devilish grin on her face. Leonard looked uncertain while Penny grinned eagerly. "I have some camping supplies if you want to borrow them."

"I would love to go! I never went camping as a kid growing up in Nebraska, and always wanted to," Penny chimed in. "If you go camping in Nebraska it's just sleeping in the corn fields."

"Are you sure?" Leonard asked quizzically. Warning bells rang in his head.

"What, you still scared Lenny?" Haley smirked. "Come on, you haven't gone since you were six."

"Come on, Leonard, please?" Penny begged, using the Bambi eyes on her fiancé.

"Alright, fine," Leonard relented. He still had a bad feeling, but it's been years. Besides, that was only a dream, right?

Pine Barrens, New Jersey

After a rousing night, Penny and Leonard sat in the large borrowed tent. "How come we haven't gone hiking yet?" Penny asked her fiancée. Leonard grunted.

"I would rather not leave camp. There are plenty of bears and New Jersey, and I don't want us to get mauled," that was not the only reason of course. Leonard had not forgotten his promise from 28 years ago.

"Come on, the forest is so pretty and I've only seen part of it! All the nice leaves are changing color and I want to take pictures," Penny said wistfully. Leonard smiled.

"Okay Penny. Let me just get a few supplies and then we'll go on a hike," Leonard grabbed a flashlight and a penknife just in case.

"Also, if we see any bears, I have this," Penny lifted the gun she had received from Bernadette's dad. It also happened to be a smart gun, in order to appease Leonard. It didn't work, but Leonard let her keep it.

The first half-hour of walking, everything seemed okay. _Maybe it was just a dream_ Leonard thought to himself. The forest really was dazzling, the sunlight streaming through the trees. Clear streams passed through the rocks and little cliffs, creating waterfalls. The forest seemed peaceful enough.

"Whoa, Leonard, look at the markings on this tree," Penny frowned, as she bent down. Such a small detail, but it was enough to send Leonard reaching for his inhaler. He remembered scratching his initial into the trees, and on the bark of this tree, he could still see the faint letter. _That night was real_ he realized.

When Penny reached to touch it Leonard lunged, his hand hitting the initial. When he stood up with his back to the tree, ropes lashed out, pinning him there. Penny screamed in horror. "What the hell!" she cried.

"Why do people always think I'm from hell," a familiar figure landed in front of them, and Penny reached for her gun. "I'm a shadow spirit, not a devil."

_I have cursed people into animals, yes, but they were always people trying to hurt me_ Leonard remembered. "Penny don't!" he shouted, but it was too late. Penny fired bullets at the Jersey devil.

The Jersey devil simply flickered into a dark silhouette, the bullets passing through her as if she was simply a shadow. The bullets collided into a tree, and Katrien returned to her previous form.

"Leave us alone b-bitch!" Penny cried out in fear. That insult just made things worse.

When he had first met Katrien, she greeted him with kind eyes. He realized now it was because of his youth that she was helpful to him. Now, she glared at the couple with cruel eyes, as if she were a god about to wipe out a village for insulting it. Her eyes turned ruby red and glowed fiercely. "Foolish mortal," she hissed. "I'm a shadow spirit, not a devil, despite my name. I was about to free your companion and simply wipe this memory. Now, you have only yourself to blame," a black staff appeared next to her and she gripped it, lowering the magical weapon at Leonard's fiancée.

Shadowy tendrils shot out of the staff, hitting Penny in the chest. Penny gasped, and went to her knees. In less than a second, a golden retriever replaced Leonard's fiancée.

Naturally, the dog barked at the devil. "Stop barking at me, bitch."

"Hey, Penny is not a bitch!"

"I fail to see how your fiancée is not a female dog at the moment," The Jersey Devil said dryly, her eyes returning to blue. Her appearance had changed very little in the last twenty-eight years, and she was clearly still 18. "Frankly you might be better off with her like this. She doesn't remember being human right now. Dogs supposed to be loyal to their companions I have a feeling Penny may not be the same with relationships."

Leonard's heart pounded. It did not take a person like Sheldon to know that Penny was a flight risk. She had slept with dozens of men before him. Leonard took a deep breath. "Please, just turn her back. I'd do anything for her, Katrien," The Jersey Devil's eyes flashed for a second with hurt. Then they hardened.

"Do not think I forgot about you Leonard. I hoped you would forget about me though, and this forest," Katrien eyes lowered to Penny, who had sat down in front of Leonard. "Fine. I will turn your fiancée back into a human," Leonard's heart soared with hope. "But at a cost," she warned him.

"Please, I'd do anything, just don't hurt Penny," Leonard begged, his hands still tied to the tree.

"I never intended to," she said her eyes narrowing. "Tell me, in this day and age, Penny would be considered beautiful, yes?"

"A goddess," he answered quickly.

"Ah, but I have met girls like that. Nothing has changed with them in the past over 200 years I have lived. They are dependent on worship, as if they are Aphrodite themselves," The Jersey devil's glowing eyes studied him for a moment. "I will turn your fiancée back, in exchange for your sight."

Leonard's eyes shut tight with tears. "I'll give you my sight," He promised.

Katrien snapped her fingers, and the ropes released him. She summoned a pen and parchment out of thin air, along with a clipboard. She tilted her head for a moment, and then scribbled down on parchment. When she finished, she handed it off to Leonard.

_In exchange for the spell, I Leonard Hofstadter agrees to:_

_Give up my sight._

_Neither Penny nor I will tell anyone about what happened. If this occurs, the spell returns._

There was a line for Leonard to sign, then another paragraph.

_As a bonus, if either of you so much as kiss another person on the lips while you two are still together the spell returns._

Leonard swallowed, and then scribbled down his signature. Katrien produced a book out of thin air, and handed it to Leonard, taking the clipboard.

Katrien waved her hand above the paper and the English letters turned into Egyptian hieroglyphs. Suddenly, Leonard's eye began burning in pain. He blinked several times, until his vision cleared the last thing he saw was Penny rushing towards him and Katrien melting into the shadows, before he lost his vision all together.

"Leonard!" Penny shouted, embracing her fiancé. "Are you alright? All I remember is seeing her and then a light hitting my chest. Also a desire for dog treats for some reason."

He heard himself say, "After you tried to kill her, she briefly explained she was just going to wipe our memories. Instead, she turned you into a golden retriever in revenge. I had met her before actually when I was six. She had helped me, and I promised I would stay away from this place." Now came the hard part. "I convinced her to change you back, but at a cost," he said quietly. "I gave up my sight for you," he heard Penny burst into tears.

"This is my fault!" she wailed. "I hadn't forced you to come, if I hadn't found the marking, if I hadn't shot that gun, you could still see."

"It's okay Penny," he said, his head in her soft hair.

"I really am a bitch," she sniffled.

"Hey, you are not a female dog. Well, at least not anymore," she laughs softly and kisses him. "Just promise me this: you will always stay by my side." Penny smiles against his lips.

"I promise."

Two years later, Leonard was working with Leslie on a long project when he comes home at as late as 3 a.m. When he opens the door to his new home, a disgruntled donkey walks past him. A golden retriever rushes to meet him, crying as if knows it has done a horrible thing. It stood and whimpered at Leonard's feet, and Leonard realizes Penny is still with him in her new form.

Fin

**There you have it folks, the darkest story I have ever written. The message: don't break promises, unless you want a curse. There's a dark humor in this at how only the so-called devil doesn't break promises.**

**Okay, before you kill me, let me explain the ending. That is the third and final version, left deliberately vague to torture you readers. If you want to see my ramblings, see the next two paragraphs. I would recommend reading the third, since that is supposed to explain the motive for the Jersey Devil's vengeance. **

**The first version was a bit lengthy, but it didn't quite fit into the end. Zach comes over after penny invites him over. Since Leonard is working late, Zach thinks Penny is still single (and doesn't notice the wedding band). Penny just invited him so she doesn't have to eat alone, but he thinks it's a date. Anyway, at the end of the dinner Zach leans over and kisses Penny, and *poof* instant literal bitch and literal ass! (By the way, the whole dog thing is just a joke on Katrien's part.) Anyway, Katrien senses the spell activating, and she shadow-travels to their house, and to her horror, sees Penny transforming into a dog even though it's Zach's fault. There's an **_**oh crap what have I done**_ **moment before she explains to Leonard what happened. She quickly rushes back to New Jersey, and for three days, she searches for the reversal spell. Meanwhile, Penny acts as Leonard's guide dog, and he keeps running into poles because of it. After three days, the curse is reversed, and there's some form of happily ever after. The story ends with Leonard's sight returning on his deathbed, and the last the he sees is Penny. This got too lengthy for me to write though. **

**That was the first version. The second was Penny deliberately cheating on Leonard, and Katrien cursing her with immortality as a dog. Wracked with guilt, Penny serves Leonard until the days he dies, and then wanders the rest of the world help those with blindness. I ditched that as well, since there was too much character bashing in it and I wanted to avoid that. Yes, Penny isn't perfect in this story but I hope I made it clear ****there is no character bashing****, she just made costly mistakes. Plus, this is my first time writing her; don't judge me. Frankly, I view her as a modern version of Lucie Manette. **

**One more thing: if you hate my OC, you've missed the point. Imagine it from her view. View the camping grounds as the street in front of your house, and the forest as your home and front yard. If strangers are sleeping on your street, you are already going to be nervous. A kid wouldn't bother you since it does not mean harm. However, when a stranger goes into your own house and tries to kill you, it's not going to be sunshine and rainbows, is it? You are going to defend yourself. That's why Katrien lashes out; she views the forest as her home and Penny as a threat.**

**Lastly, there are only two Ocs in this: Katrien Liens (The Jersey Devil), and Jason, Leonard's nephew. The show mentioned everyone else at least once. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Finally... The long awaited second chapter... Because I am a chronic procrastinator**

A little bit before we last left off...

"Godverdomme!" The Jersey Devil cursed as she watched what was unfolding before her as she watched in her element. She saw Penny shove the tall man off of her, a dazed look in his eyes. In an instant she raised her hand and promptly judo-flipped him.

"I'm married!" She cried, "Didn't you know?"

The man looked sheepish, sprawled out on the ground. "Um, no. You kept mentioning Leonard but I thought you had broken up with him and stayed friends. Oops," Penny looked ready to murder the man.

Penny tensed, getting ready to punch him. The devil acted on accord. She reached out, transforming from darkness to a physical being. Tendrils of shadows reached out and enveloped Zach, before quickly rushing back to the Jersey Devil. As soon as the shadows recoiled, a dusty-brown donkey stood in the middle of a living room. The Jersey Devil got up, standing with her wings folded behind her back.

She stumbled for a second, before meeting Penny's eyes. "We need to talk, right now. We've got about ten minutes before my magic catches up to you, and turns you into a dog." Penny just stared at her, open-mouthed. "Close your mouth, you'll get flies." Penny blinked, and complied.

"I'm sorry, what? I remember you're the Jersey Devil," the girl flinched at the mention of that title, "and you took Leonard's eyesight, but why come to Pasadena?" she pursed her lips.

"One, the name's Katrien Liens, before you call me by my title again. When both of you came into my forest, well, I was kind of mad at both of you. You for trying to kill me, and Leonard for breaking the promise he made years about staying away. I don't like it when mortals come near me, because instances like what happened two years ago tend to happen. Beings like me, well, we're a bit temperamental."

"Yeah, I can tell" Penny muttered.

Anyway, in exchange for your return to original form, I made him sign a contract. Reversal spells always take sacrifice, so I took his eyesight. But, also on the contract, I added two things: that the two of you may never tell anyone about me, and that neither may so much kiss another person on the lips or the curse returns. I added that as incentive to prevent affairs. Problem is, I'm a shadow spirit, not a devil. I suck at contracts unlike those creatures," she said with distaste.

"Uh, you have horns, a tail and bat wings," Penny asked. Katrien glared at her, mentally smiting the blonde.

"I was cursed to look like this by my insane mother. Luckily I was born with other talents and gifts that more than make up for this curse. Namely magic and immortality," she snapped, her right hand clenching and unclenching.

Penny held her hands out in front of her, taking a step back. "Getting back to the problem, you messed up, and in ten minutes I'm about to turn into a dog. Great. Now how do we prevent this?" the younger woman glowered at her.

"I can't prevent it. Right now I'm slowing it down, but at some point I'm going to use up my magic reserves. I blew most of it just getting here," She replied, slumping on the couch.

"So I'm just supposed to just sit here and wait until poof! I'm a dog!" Penny started sounding desperate. "How am I supposed to get to work tomorrow?" Katrien raised an eyebrow.

"Really, that's your priority right now?" Penny glared at her, but fear seeped into her face. Katrien shut her eyes, saying "Just- Just calm down. Everything is going to fine. I need to take a nap before I pass out, and once Leonard gets here I can fix this." Penny instantly relaxed.

"How did you do that?' she asked, amazed.

"Words have power. Even after they've been said or written, they continue to resonate." Katrien didn't meet Penny's eyes. "Even so, I have… special abilities. But don't make me go into detail."

Suddenly Katrien's stomach growled and her face flushed with embarrassment. "Uh, could I have some food?" She looked less like an immortal being at the moment and more of an awkward teen.

'Sure," Penny agreed. "What would you like?" Katrien wavered for a second.

"Hot chocolate," she admitted. Penny laughed, as the nervous tension started to ease between them. Penny took out the tin of Starbucks hot chocolate, stirring the powder in water before nuking it in the microwave.

"How do you know about hot chocolate anyway?"

"I'm antisocial, not a hermit. I stick with the times. Otherwise I have a feeling you wouldn't be able to understand me," the corners of her mouth twitched upward. "I'm a little over two hundred years your senior, and yet you don't treat me as your elder."

"You don't even look like you can drink!" Penny protested, while Katrien flashed a devilish grin, fangs sticking out. The microwave chirped, and the spirit pulled the hot chocolate, stirring it into froth.

"I'm immortal, whaddya expect?" Katrien took a sip of the hot chocolate, and her form shimmered before solidifying slightly as the drink went through her system.

"How come you don't have the Jersey accent if you're the Jersey Devil? Shouldn't you talk like you're from the Jersey Shore?" Penny wondered out loud. The shadow spirit snarled.

"That's a freakin' stereotype! Who'd ya think ya are insulting me by comparing me to those pieces of dragon crap!" Katrien ranted, before looking down to see a golden retriever whimpering.

"Ah, hell."

A Half hour later…

Sometimes Leonard wondered if his life was some sort of running joke for the fates. As if they liked to write his life as one joke after another, just to annoy him. Apparently this new gag went: A blind man walks into his house and the first thing he hears is a donkey. Leonard failed to see the punchline.

Leonard stood hunched over the front door, fumbling with his keys because of the loss of sight. Finally, the key slipped in, and something with bristly fur try to slip out. Instinctively, Leonard reached out for it as he had done in the past two years of his blindness. In his other hand was the cane and he used it to block the animal from exiting. "Hee-haw" the animal said, being an unhelpful ass. Leonard rubbed his forehead in frustration.

"Penny, why is there a donkey in our house?" Leonard called. Silence. Then some scuffling and the noise of a dog whimpering. Finally, Leonard heard something trotting forward towards him, and his stomach lurched.

"Penny," he whispered, as his hands felt the soft fur of a golden retriever. "What happened?" Penny turned away from him, before he heard a growl.

Suddenly, she started barking at the donkey, the ass being completely unresponsive. "Look, I don't speak dog latin. What does the donkey have to do with you turning into a golden retriever?" Is it possible to feel an eye-roll? Anyway, Penny leapt up and grabbed his sleeve, dragging him from the foyer to the living room. There Leonard heard a loud, distinct snore coming from the direction of the couch.

"Did someone break in? Er, bark once for yes, twice for no," Leonard asked. As if to confuse him further, she answered by barking three times, causing whatever was sleeping on the couch to grumble in their sleep. As if encouraged by this, Penny continued barking. "Hrmmgh," the person said in response. A pause.

"**AIEEEE!**" it shouted and Penny made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

"**Why**, why go for the tail! How would you like if I bit you?!" Leonard couldn't believe his ears.

"Katrien?"

"In the flesh," she sighed and her heard something large dropped onto the couch. "Also, tell your wife not to go around biting people who are trying to help."

"It won't happen again," Leonard promised. Penny made a low whine, and she shifted behind him, as if hiding.

"Yeah, now you're feeling guilty," Katrien said, clearly annoyed.

"Before we get off track, what happened to Penny?" He cut her off, before she could start ranting. She paused for a moment.

""Uh, you might want sit down," Leonard's stomach lurched at the prospects of what she was about to say, "because the explanation is quite long," she continued and he breathed a sigh of relief. Usually magical contracts have 24-hour warnings on before activation. This allowed me to take the ghost train west to Hollywood then fly the rest of the way. And yes, I mean that in the most literal way possible."

"Yeah, I remember," Leonard answered, the memory flashing in his head.

"When I got to your house I went into spirit form, allowing me to walk through walls and hide in the shadows. By then, the 24 hours were almost up. I watched as one of Penny's Exs- Jack? Mack? Something like that, anyway he leaned over and tried to kiss her. Then Penny judo-flipped him and I blasted the idiot into a literal ass."

"Serves him right" Leonard muttered. He cleared his throat. "Okay. That strangely made sense, except the part about the ghost train."

"Well, technically it's called Spirit trains, but I call it the ghost train because nine times out of ten I'm sitting next to one. It's run by the same guys as Spirit airways, hence the reason for no human decency. Ghosts mainly use it to visit relatives or _finally move on._ Hollywood has an entrance to Hellenistic underworld, and therefore the train goes that far," She explained, rambling towards the end.

"That was more info than I expected," Leonard grimaced. "So, glad to know she didn't cheat on me. But can you change her back?" he asked.

"Um, not exactly," Katrien answered nervously, and he heard something swish back and forth. "I didn't specify a reversal to the contract. I don't write magical contracts that often nowadays so I forgot to add that."

"So she can't be changed back!?" he looked panic-stricken.

"No it just switches to the default!" she blurted. Behind the dark glasses, Leonard tried to glare at her, hoping he was looking in the right direction. "Also, you're glaring at a couch."

"And what exactly is the default?" Leonard asked, after counting to five in his head to try to calm down

"How do all the fairy tales end?" She asked carefully.

"Happily ever after?" He heard something like a head hitting a table.

"Before that!"

"Villain dies a gruesome death?"

"Seriously!? I'm immortal you idiot, I've died painful deaths plenty of times, no need to relieve that for something so simple," She said, voice set into a growl.

"Oh! A kiss! Wait is it really that simple?"

"Yes, but the depressing part is that it took millennia before you humans figured it Brushing that comment aside, Leonard bent down, allowing Penny to crawl up to meet him. If it was possible for a dog, Penny smiled as she pressed her lips against his. Leonard shut his eyes, purely out of habit. But if he could see, he would have seen black clouds swirling around the two, before disappearing in a soft _poof!_ He pulled away for a moment, only to feel a pair of familiar _human_ lips against his. After a few seconds Katrien had to clear her throat.

"Well, that worked," she joked, and Leonard opened his eyes. First all he saw was the darkness of the glasses. But around the edges, he could see light and a very blurry room.

"Penny," he breathed. "Go get my old glasses," She looked at him blankly, not realizing why until he took the current ones off. Then she shrieked in joy, jumping up and racing to go get it. She searched frantically for the glasses, finally returning triumphant with the pair.

"Your sight returned,," Katrien observed, breaking up the happy moment. "Admittedly I expected that. But the contract is still in place. Blab about me, and the curse returns, and this time it will stay," She warned. Leonard was too relieved to register the threat, too busy hugging Penny. "One more thing," Katrien looked hesitant, almost… nervous? considering the rate of her tail swishing.

"Watch out for the picture frame," Penny said without looking up. The immortal girl cringed, and stopped at the last second.

Katrien snapped her fingers, two business cards appearing in between. "If anything out of the ordinary happens, call this number. California might be too far away for me to come and help but I can send a friend." Penny got up, taking one of the card, handing the other to Leonard. Inscribed in black ink around a circle were the latin words, "Sto procul quadrivium • Sto in obscurum" On the back was the phone number 609-XXX-XXX. "Anyone else who doesn't know me or is a threat will just see a business card to a diner. Don't call unless it's an emergency."

Penny looked touched. "Thank you," she said sincerely. "It means a lot to us that you were willing to help."

A faint blush appeared on Katrien's cheeks. _Has anyone actually thanked her before_ Leonard wondered.

'Eh, not necessary but you're welcome." Katrien stammered, tail rustling back and forth again. "I probably should get going or I'll miss the train," she mumbled.

"Do want anything for the ride?" Leonard asked, his hand intertwining with Penny's.

"Nah, it's fine. It will just weigh me down," she said dismissively. She walked over and opened the back door, but stayed there, hesitant. "Good-bye."

"Wait, what are we supposed to do with the donkey?" Leonard called as she stepped out.

"Sell it!" she called back, walking towards the street.

"Come outside, there's something you'll want to see," Leonard told Penny smiling. The two opened the front door seeing Katrien in the middle of the street. She bent down, as if about to dash, and her wings snapped open. With the asphalt as her runway, she dashes down the street, wings flapping. In only a few seconds she's in the air, flying over rooftops.

Down on earth, the happy couple watched as she flew towards the stars.

**Epilogue**

The next day, Leonard stood over the toaster, waiting for the bread to jump out. On the table, Penny sat with a cup of coffee in one hand, the New York Times in the other. A normal domestic scene.

"You think we'll see her again?" Penny asked. Leonard looked up, surprised.

"I don't know. Maybe? But we can't visit her," he warned. Penny rolled her eyes.

"Not what I meant. It's just… I kind of liked her. Nice girl, if a bit, how did she put it? Temperamental, that's the word." Penny turned over to the crossword section. "Hey it's part of the crossword!"

Out of curiosity, she took the card out of her pocket, having only glimpsed it. Surprised she noticed scribbly handwriting next to the phone number. _Tell me when she's born, I've always wanted to be a godmother._ Penny smiled, and watched as the words faded, leaving a white box. "Hey Leonard, could I borrow a pen?" He nodded, handing one over.

_How did you know? _ She scribbled back.

_Magic, duh. Also, I recommend the names Eva, Anna and Laura._ Penny coughed, holding back a laugh. Leonard glanced at her, but she waved it off.

_I'll consider it._ Penny wrote back. "Hey Leonard, do you want to go shopping today?" He looked up from the coffee, surprised.

"Sure, what do you need?" He asked, after taking a sip of coffee.

"It's not for me, it's for the baby?" She said nonchalantly. He looked at her and she broke out in a huge smile. Leonard got up and hugged her careful with her belly. "And I have a feeling they'll be smart _and_ beautiful," she whispered.

"A dream come true," he whispered back. And so the couple hugged, one-step closer to a real happy ever after.

Fin

**This ended up being rather cracky, as that's how I tend to write stories. Thanks for read, and please review, (criticism welcome! So long as it's not anti-Lenny but rather "hey you missed a period there," or "needs more detail!" I did not have a beta-reader to critique this, hence the mistakes.)**

**This is one of my favorite fandoms, though unfortunately there aren't that many fantasy stories here: I intend to fix that. I may write a sequel to this, focusing on the aftermath of the spell and how it affects their child. Also in the works: I need to finish the second chapter to Hocus Pocus Hoedown, and I may write a crossover with TBBT and Sherlock. **


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